Edits, edits, and more freakin' edits.

   I think so far the aspect of this all that I dislike the most is the editing process.  Having to go over everything again, and again just gets so damn tedious.  I've started to lose count of how many times I've re-read what I have so far.
   Picking it apart for even the tiniest flaws, misspellings and errors.  Rewording, rearranging, or even completely rewriting some sections.  And word repetition.  Oh fuck, don't even get me started on word repetition.  I can't seem to get away from it.  There was a paragraph in chapter 4 that had the same word used five friggin' times.  The hell was I thinking?
   An upside to the editing and re-reading thing is that it allows me to see what the book is becoming.  Now that its been refined a few times and some of the rough edges sanded down, I can say that I am happy with how my little tale is developing.  With every round of edits it's really starting to read and feel like an actual novel.  A few times I've even caught myself forgetting that I am supposed to be making corrections and actually getting involved in what I'm reading.
   Unfortunately my editor is still out with his medical stuff, and due to other familial obligations and responsibilities,  he has been unable to return to editing with me and may not be able to finish the project at all.  Which will suck on toast because a) My grammar sucks, so those edits will be crap. And b) I will now probably have to pay someone to do the final editing.  Which is expeeeeeensive.  Not ridiculously so, but for a lives-paycheck-to-paycheck kinda dude like myself, its gonna be a big hit to the'ol pocketbook.
   Kind of a necessary evil though.  I'm so focused on the edits because I don't want people stumbling over what they're reading.  Nothing ruins getting sucked into a book like having to abruptly stop and ask, "What the hell does that mean?"
   I really want the story to flow.  To be as polished as I can get it before tossing it out to the wolves.
   Before I leave you this time I have a small announcement.  I have finally selected a section of the book to use as a teaser.  Once the edits to it are done I will make it available.  Hopefully in the next week or so.

Research & Development

   This is my first blog post from my new smart phone so I apologize if the errors are more rampant than normal.
   Haven't made much progress.  Partially due to health issues and partially due to straying outside of my research zone.  From the prologue to the end of C7 the book stayed in the area I had initially looked into.  Now that I have moved past it I find myself stuck until I learn the new one.
   One of the surprises for me in this go round at writing is the large amounts of research I have had to do.  Before I just sat down and wrote.  The world was a fictional one purely dreamed up in my imagination.  I didn't need to do research (I stupidly thought at the time.) if I made it all up.  Now having started this project and going into it with the mindset of 'research good' I may chafe at the delay some times, but I like the depth it gives my story.  Sometimes I find myself doing hours of research simply for a line or two.  But it seems that making sure you have that line or two sounding right or simply being accurate is the difference between your book reading like an amateurs first draft and having it read like a real novel.
   A little research can go a long way.  Not to mention in this age of information people can, and will, find any and all mistakes and will be happy to broadcast them to everyone else.  An hour getting your shit straight can save you a lot of headaches later.
  I have also dipped my toes into a technique that I may keep.  When I found myself at a research stand still I became frustrated with it.  I still wanted to write damn it.  Some writers can skip around their creation lah-de-dah when they get stuck and just come back later.  I am not one of those.
   I have found however  that I may be able to skip books.  I have been chomping at the bit to get to the second book.  Story wise that's where I want to be.  So as an experiment I went ahead and wrote the prologue for the second book to my current project.  I may keep at it because while the first book is still my primary goal and focus of my efforts, there really isn't anything story wise that's going develop that I can't keep track of.  AND it will give me a head start for when the first one is done and I can shift my focus to the next project.  Finally got to introduce a character I have been really looking forward to, and can't waitto do so regularly.

The fine line between weird and just plain nuts...

     This morning I sat here in front of my laptop organizing files and folders for the book I'm writing and other future projects and found myself working on character bios.  Some current, some to-be.  One of them is the mother of the protagonist in my current project.
     Her name is Norma.
     I have given a lot of thought to this character because while she won't spend much actual time in the series (At least as far as I have planned so far.) her presence will be felt quite a bit.  Norma is not a nice person.  In fact one might describe her as a raging cunt.  I don't normally like to use that word but if the shoe fits.  Through her cruelty and neglect she has inflicted things on the main character that will reverberate through out the series for quite awhile.  So far her character has solely existed only in my mind.  I've dredged up some pretty nasty things that she is going to do.  And for some reason beginning to fill out that character sheet I actually found myself experiencing a genuine emotion toward the character
     Hate.
     Or to be more precise, anger.  Taking that step toward making the character "real" made me think of every nightmarish thing I am going to have her inflict on Dean and I truly began to hate the bitch.
     The moment I realized what was going on I had to stop and reflect on the oddity of it.  Here is someone who does not never has, nor ever will, exist.  A thing of pure thought that I created, doing things that I have her doing and I despise her for it.  So here's the thing... did I just take a step closer to insanity or does that mean I am on the right track?  I've read of other authors becoming emotionally attached to certain characters, or at the very least claiming so, and personally doubted the validity of such a thing.  I mean having genuine emotions for something purely fictional seems a bit daft.  Can you really feel for something that doesn't exist?
     I think the answer is yes.  Using the 'Dresden Files' as an example I have become attached to the people Jim Butcher has brought to life.  The emotions I experience while reading them are not any less true because they don't actually exist.  So why wouldn't I feel something like that for the ones I create?  I want you the reader to feel what I feel when I read the works of others.  To laugh when they laugh, cry when they cry, love when they love.
     I feel like something happened to me at that moment.  It was one of those times that you look back on later and say, "That's when it changed.  From then on I was altered."
     I think I just became a real writer.

I get by with a little help from my friends...

     FINALLY finished off chapter seven.  So far I have probably struggled with that chapter more than any other thus far.  I have to give credit to a couple a different sources for it.  One is a guy I work with who with a simple idea got me to pump out nearly a page.  The other is a long-time friend who got my creative juices flowing simply by letting me talk.  It really is a lot of fun to simply jabber about what I'm doing.  Talking shop with another writer or even someone who is creating something of their own can inspire like no other.
     It was also nice to be able to throw ideas and concepts that I have been keeping from my other guinea pigs (I mean beta-readers.) simply because I don't want to ruin anything and I need their feedback unbiased. Telling my buddy everything was kind of an experiment that ended up being a rousing success.
     The high I got talking his ear off about it sustained me through a pretty rough week.  Ended up with an ear and a tooth infection that left me pretty hopped up on some groovy pain killers.  Which I normally would have enjoyed (The pain killer part, not the infection.) except it made writing anything more than a little difficult.  Kinda hard to jot stuff down when the words keep moving.
     Never turn down any source of potential inspiration.  I'm not saying show off what your doing to everyone you can, that's how ideas get stolen, but don't spurn telling someone just because they don't seem like the "ideal" candidate.  The non-reader buddy you talk to may hit you with an idea or concept that would never have occurred to you otherwise.  The guy I work with just made an offhand comment and I got around a page out of it.  And when you haven't written jack shit in over two weeks a page is a lot.
     Also follow your favorite authors or writers online.  I follow several on Twitter and have gotten words of encouragement from some.  Recently Kevin Hearne (Author of the Iron Druid Chronicles, which I can't recommend enough.) posted some words of encouragement about word count and when I thanked him I actually heard back.  If I ever make it in this business I plan to take a page out of Mr. Hearne's book and actually respond to my followers.  Anything I could do to help a fellow newb like his simple words helped me would be passing on a kindness that has far reaching effects.
     I would like to thank Mr. Hearne not only for writing some hilarious and entertaining books but for remembering the little guy and setting an example of what an author should be.

The Swamp Of Sadness

     Getting through C7 I feel like Atreyu slogging it through the muck.  Gained some ground with a good suggestion from a friend, but now find myself back in it up to my neck.  Maybe the luck dragon of inspiration will save me before the G'Mork of depression rips my legs off.
     Its there.  The substance of the scene is there but it keeps slipping through my fingers like a greased toad.
     Found a new show to inspire.  Hemlock Grove.  Finished watching it and felt a kind of kinship.  It had a very amateur feel to it, but it was done with a lot of heart.  It also had a very Hayao Miyazaki feel in that whole writing despicable characters that you can't help but identify and even like thing.
     Hate having the drive but not the ability to move forward.  There's so much more I want to do with it, so many paths to wander down.  I have such a hard time doing anything but look forward.  I want to be there, not here.  Need to lock my attention down on the here.
     Here's hoping I can kick this in the ass and get moving.

Got the madness covered, now how 'bout some method.

I feel like I'm trying to level up but can't find a quest.  Haven't done jack squat in about two weeks.  Nothing new anyway.  Took the time to go back and just read what I have so far.  Kind of a chance to stop and make sure I'm still coloring in between the lines.  So far I like what I'm seeing.
     But I keep getting hung up on the smallest things.  Trying to get this seed of an idea to grow into a full blown scene has been like pulling frelling teeth.  So far every version of the scene in the gun shop has come out like a really bad exploitation film.  Think 'Pulp Fiction' directed by Uwe Boll.
     *shudder*
     Not the tone I want for my first book.
     Still having to fight against lack of motivation.  Which kinda blows my mind seeing as I can't stop thinking about it.  All day, every day, some part of my mind is thinking about some aspect of this book.  Its the first thing on my mind when I wake and the last when I go to sleep.  So why the frelling-frakking-fucking hell is it so hard to get myself to do anything?
     Part of me thinks that I may be focusing on it too much.  Thinking about one thing all the time can get a bit stressful.  Hell, I can't even play video games anymore without feeling guilty that I am not writing.  I may have somehow crossed from being my own cheerleader to being my own drill sergeant.
     One thing that I do find helps is writing while listening to music.  I know a real revelation right?  Reading AND listening to music?  I'm a freakin' genius!
     Okay, delusion over.
     But yes I do really find that music helps fuel the imagination in a way nothing else can.  Except for smell maybe but I'm not going to write the first scratch and sniff zombie book.  Ewwwwwww.  
  Classical or instrumental works well for me.  Especially soundtracks like 'Dark City', 'Close Encounters of the Third Kind', or 'Braveheart'.  Also the soundtrack for Halo: ODST.  And last but not in anyway least the soundtrack for Skyrim and Minecraft.  Mix generously with random Weird Al and MST3K music tracks, blend and enjoy.
     Serve chilled.

Implementing an idea...

   I find myself regularly struggling to take an idea and make it into a scene.  In this case I need more conflict for my little band of adventurers and decided to give them some competition for much needed equipment.  That's the idea.  Turning it into an interesting scene is another ball of wax.
   Aside from the creative stuff of who does and says what, just the continuity is enough of a problem. Who is where in the room, what are they doing, what have they done or said. How much personality do I give to people I know are about to get munched on by zombies.
   Taking a nugget of an idea and trying to make something out of it is like trying to make a pizza crust with too little dough.  I'm always trying to fill gaps that open up. 
   This is another area that the motto of 'KEEP FREAKIN' WRITING' deffinitely applies. Its been pretty cool to see some of the things I've come up with just typing out the first thing that comes to mind. My mind pulling bits and pieces from every T.V. show, film, book, and comic I have ever experienced and mashing them together. Sometimes with really bizarre results.
   It's cool seeing characters evolve as both the book and I grow.  It's also a bit odd to have something that exists purely in your mind begin to have a mind of its own.  Maybe to be a good author you need to be an itsy-bit-schitzy.  You end up with some serious Smeagol/Gollum moments going on which can be enlightening and frightening as what's essentially different slivers of your own personality interact with each other.
   The more I write the more often I find myself questioning my own sanity.  The things I see in my head can't possibly be fueled by anything but pure insanity.  Just a spark of madness mind you, but isn't a spark enough?
   The world isn't scary or messed up enough, so let's add zombies.  Don't believe in love or see hope?  Create it.  Add heroes and heroines that one rarely finds anymore.  People who do the right thing because it's the right thing to do.
  Humans are never satisfied with what is.  That's what I love about books and writing is that we are unhappy with how things are we just ignore what's real and make it up and then share our reality with other people.  There are few things I love more in this world than picking up a book and slipping into someone else's head for awhile.